We spend most of our lives listening with our minds—analyzing, categorizing, planning our response before someone finishes speaking. But what if we could listen from somewhere deeper?
Most of us grew up learning to prioritize logic over feeling. We live from the neck up, letting our brains dominate every conversation and decision. It’s become such an ingrained habit that we don’t even notice we’re doing it. Our hearts—that deeper, more intuitive part of ourselves—rarely get a voice.
Our brains are incredible. They help us survive, organize chaos, and solve problems. But they also create divisions where connections exist. They build walls between “us” and “them,” between “my problems” and “your problems.” When we listen only with our minds, we miss the underlying truth: we’re all connected.
The Practice
Here’s something you can try today.
Sit down with a friend or family member. Ask them how they’re really doing. Then for the next ten minutes, just listen. Don’t interrupt. Don’t offer advice. Don’t start planning what you’ll say next.
Instead, breathe deeply. Feel your chest rise and fall. Drop your awareness out of your head and into your body—your heart, your belly. Just be present with whatever they’re sharing.
You’ll probably notice it’s harder than it sounds. Your mind will want to jump in with solutions or similar stories from your own life. That’s normal. Just keep coming back to your breath, to your body, to simply being there.
What Changes
When you listen this way, something shifts. You stop seeing problems to fix and start feeling what the other person feels. The boundaries between you soften. Instead of judgment or advice, you find yourself filled with warmth and understanding.
Your friend will feel it too. They’ll likely open up in ways they wouldn’t otherwise. They’ll go deeper because they sense they’re actually being heard—not just their words, but their whole self.
This kind of listening is rare. It’s also one of the most generous gifts we can offer another person.
The world needs more of this right now. More connection, less division. More feeling, less overthinking. More heart, less head.
Try it and see what happens.
